Intensities in Ten Suburbs

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Commercial Break: The Worst Wife in Commercial Banking

Posted by Andrew Unterberger on April 20, 2010

Molly Culver, what have you done to yourself? I liked you well enough back in your VIP days, and you were one of the more tolerable regular commentators on the I Love the _____s Vh1 series. Is playing the most smug, self-centered, and thoroughly oblivious shrew in TV advertising really the best career move you can muster these days?

Really, it’s hard to properly explain how much hatred I have in my heart for this character, or sympathy for her poor henpecked husband, who once–just once–I want to see end that ski-loft commercial by just railing into her. “Yeah, you like that, don’t you, you little bitch? You thought you were sooo fuckin’ smart with your cute little games, but now who looks like a silly fucking whore, huh?” And then he starts with the thoroughly inappropriate racial slurs. Don’t ask.

Anyway, point is, is that a surprising numbher of YouTube commentors have already summed up my feelings about these spots far better than I ever could:

Totaljett: “That was selfish. He wanted to use the points for both their pleasure and her ass used them already for her own. Typical woman move.”

doyouwantaspoon: “fucking stupid bitch, i would divorce her ass so fast and take fucking EVERYTHING because I know she wouldnt have paid for shit.”

anrew2: “fuck this woman words cannot even describe how much i hate her who uses all the fucking points that the husband has obviously saved up to be a terrific husband and what does she do? uses them on some shitty dress fuck this bitch she deserves to got shot wit that dress on so she is dead and the dress is ruined that dress looks like a 4 yr old kid made it… this husband should use the next chase points to hire a hitman to kill her ass by hanging her with her greed ridden purchase of that dress”

Tatooine92: “I’m a girl, but I wouldn’t have ever been that selfish. That’s just dumb. Therefore, I despise the woman in the commercial. DIE, woman-in-the-commercial.”

David19s: “why does chase use this transvestite in thier commercials …enough to make you not want to use this bank”


4 Responses to “Commercial Break: The Worst Wife in Commercial Banking”

  1. Noir said

    There are so many commercials these days that feature stupid men and their know-it-all wives. This one puts the wife in a bad light, but it’s so subtle that you hardly notice unless you really pay attention. And the guy just smiles…no repercussions of course. Can’t have that!

    As long as I’m here, how about Rick Springfield’s “Jessie’s Girl” for the Friday request line? Nobody I have ever known named Jesse has spelled their name with an i.

  2. Dan said

    Here is my request:

    “Bad Romance” – Lady Gaga
    “NY State of Mind” – Nas
    “Plateau” – The Meat Puppets
    “Go Your Own Way” – Fleetwood Mac

  3. excellent. I’m glad I’m not the only one who HATES those commercials.

  4. Anton said

    You’re all ridiculous. If my wife bought something she looks that good in, I would be perfectly happy, provided two things happen. One, we go out for a show and a nice dinner while she is wearing that dress, preferably with friends or work acquaintances, and two, the night following this lovely evening would involve raunchy sex while she was still wearing said dress.

    Fuck a cruise.

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